Wit & Wisdom of Golf

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

Roller coaster - An up-and-down round.

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

Rope hook - Term for a low, hard hook that will run great distances after hitting the ground. Very bad.

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

Rough - Unmown, naturally wild area bordering the fairway and sometimes separating the fairway from the tee. There are three basic types of rough: low rough, a narrow strip of 6-inch-high grass where the ball may be easily playable; high or deep rough, where the ball may be lost and, even if found, may be obstructed or otherwise unplayable; and dark rough, where the ball may be eaten or stolen and used as an object of worship by primitive peoples.

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

Round - Eighteen holes of golf, played in their proper sequence, followed by one or more additional rounds at the 19th hole.

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

Routine - Term used facetiously to describe a par that is made under anything but routine circumstances. For example, if you hole out an eighty-yard wedge shot for par, you might exclaim, "Another routine par, my friend."

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

Rub of the Green - A phrase used in the rules of golf to describe a situation in which the flight of a ball is interrupted by anything other than another player in the match or his or her caddy or equipment. In such cases the match is continued and the ball is played from wherever it lands unless "whatever accidentally stopped or deflected the ball rattles, hisses, spits, growls or snarls; or stings, bites or drools; or makes menacing gestures or motions, or circles or makes ready to pounce; or has claws, fangs, a gun, a badge or a lawyer."

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

Rules - As currently constituted, the rules of golf consist of 34 basic regulations. The present record for breaking them in a single 18-hole round is an astonishing 31, with 69 penalty strokes, set in 1983 by H. B. Nichols at Bluster Bluffs C.C. in Smug Harbor, Long Island.

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

Run - Whenever the ball is moving along the ground, it is said to be running. This is also what you should do if you bet and then don't have enough money to cover your losses.

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

S-word - Ssssssh! This is a very bad word in golf. A shank is a shot that flies ninety degrees to the right after the ball has been struck with the club's hosel. So devastating is this affliction that if you get the shanks, the best thing to do is leave the course immediately and seek professional help— from your bartender.

[Stan Nehilla]

Golf Dictionary

Sand Trap - A deep depression filled with sand filled with golfers in a deep depression.